Jaclyn changes her first light bulb, ever.

The end of our semester got pretty chaotic/busy. Michelle told me many times to update this blog, even gave me topics. I slacked. So here’s something you missed:

This big frat guy broke Michelle’s ankle – kind of. The tragedy struck during an intramural soccer game. The sprain swelled up so bad that there’s probably no way I could exaggerate it. It was big. It was purple. Her leg even depleted in muscle mass because this beast of a sprain took forever to heal.

Pobre Michelle

In the mean time, our light bulb in our bathroom went out. No big deal, right? Um, HUGE deal. Our bathroom is as dark as death without the light bulb because there is no window. I went to the dorm security guard because maintenance was closed and asked him for a new light bulb. He had a cardboard box full of light bulbs right behind him but would not lend me one because “management” has to come switch out my light bulb. ASU students are not allowed to change light bulbs on their own, apparently.

So here it is, 9pm and Michelle already has to crutch into the shower, now she’s supposed to do this in the dark?

We didn’t take no for an answer. We changed the light bulb ourselves by switching out the dead bathroom light with the light from Michelle’s desk lamp.

Light bulb!

It was the first time I had ever changed a light bulb, but hold on to your “how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?” jokes, because I was brunette when said light bulb switch-er-roo occurred.

Let there be liiiiight

Our Dresses Are Famous!!!

nbd

Red Lipstick

Nothing says classy like red lipstick. So naturally a quick trip to Walgreen’s turned into a wonderful exploration of all colors red. It was my idea originally, but Jaclyn quickly jumped in. I have purchased at least half a dozen different types of reds in a sad attempt to be fashionable, only to discover I either look like a cholla or a clown. It’s bad. And Anna benefits from my loss. The girl was blessed with a red-friendly skin tone.

So we analyzed and prodded at all the different reds and brands, finding a solution in the Revlon on sale. Of course we ran home and tried it on too. And took pictures for this very blogging reason.

really, red?

Yes!

2010 in review

The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:

The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Fresher than ever.

Crunchy numbers

The Leaning Tower of Pisa has 296 steps to reach the top. This blog was viewed about 1,100 times in 2010. If those were steps, it would have climbed the Leaning Tower of Pisa 4 times

 

In 2010, there were 26 new posts, not bad for the first year! There were 36 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 33mb. That’s about 3 pictures per month.

The busiest day of the year was August 25th with 81 views. The most popular post that day was About us.

Where did they come from?

The top referring sites in 2010 were facebook.com, en.search.wordpress.com, twitter.com, search.aol.com, and hopefaithloveisallyouneed.wordpress.com.

Some visitors came searching, mostly for cheese pizza, pizza cheese, thenakedroommate.wordpress.com, cheese pizza slice, and nutella naked.

Attractions in 2010

These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.

1

About us August 2010

2

yessica.the naked one. August 2010
1 comment

3

“Be an adult when ordering pizza!” October 2010
2 comments

4

1. 2. POP! October 2010

5

You’ve got some ‘splaning to do!!!! October 2010

“My Cardigan is famous!!!”

 

Chiquita Bananas Unite!!!

Jaclyn’s response to me never going away to summer camp as a kid…

Sexy Phlegm

Well, it finally got me. After a month of avoidance, I got Michelle’s sexy phlegm.

Come to think of it, Michelle is always sick. Or, at least when she gets sick, she is sick FOREVER. Within one week of meeting her, she came down with some kind of laryngitis mixed with whooping cough. You walked in the door of the sixth floor building and knew she was home if you heard a woof-like sound coming from down the hall.

But no worries, I figured it all out.

Mistake Number One: She talks incessant crap about vitamin C. She thinks it gives her “canker sores” in her mouth. Pfft. I grew up in a household where we had vitamin C for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and I do not get canker sores. It’s all in her head.

Mistake Number Two: When she’s sick, which is always, she AVOIDS milk. Milk, which gives you strong bones. Milk, which has been scientifically proven to make you skinny. Milk, which I also drink for breakfast, lunch and dinner. She thinks it makes her “stuffy.”

Mistake Number Three: The girl does not sleep.

How are you ever going to get better if you swear off vitamin C, milk and sleep? You won’t. Hence, Michelle.

So, now I’m feeling sick, but at least I have a sexy new rhaspy voice. Mind you, this is not my fault. I took all the proper precautions to avoid this. I think Michelle has been licking the tops of all of our clean cups, like Phoebe did.

1. 2. POP!

 

Still healthy....I promise

 

I apologize for the fact that we talk about nothing but food and know that we aren’t in fact obese, but very health conscious snackers. So with that in mind…

We needed a snack and Jaclyn asked if we have popcorn. Popcorn honestly isn’t usually in our snack category. I start looking around because I know there has to be one somewhere in our mass of food (see picture of food shelves). Jaclyn gets up and starts scouring the shelves, and soon enough we’re knocking things down, and finding large amounts of green tea. Buried in the back of the second shelf underneath the the world’s greatest cookies we have one package! Being the health conscious snacker that I am it is the kind with absolutely no butter, salt and 99% fat free. Wooo health! Butter lover on the other hand wasn’t entirely excited about this.

Did you know that popcorn can take anywhere from 2-5 minutes? Thank you very non-specific instructions! We have a rather complex microwave. I haven’t mastered anything else other than “quick minute” and popcorn is a delicate thing to make. Apparently someone  at Jaclyn’s work burned popcorn today and the smell was horrific. We don’t want everyone on our floor to hate us either, so Jaclyn advised to wait until there are 2 seconds in between pops. I push the popcorn button and start walking around drowning out the popping noise. Of course I completely forget about popcorn and start focusing on something else. I hear a loud clang from Jaclyn’s reading corner and her shouting, “ONE, TWO, POP!!!! I SAID ONE, TWO, POP AND YOU WALKED AWAY!!!!!” I look out to see her soaring and tripping and flailing in the direction of the microwave. There may have been some minor knee injuries too.

It was perfect.

“Be an adult when ordering pizza!”

Quick! Give me your gut reaction. Which one of these looks more appetizing to you?

 

Exhibit A: flimsy, greasy, old CHEESE pizza. aka pizza for babies.

 

OR

 

Exhibit B: delicious, appetizing, flavorful TOPPING filled pizza. aka pizza for adults.

 

Michelle has not fully reached adulthood. That’s right, she still eats cheese pizza. I have never ordered Domino’s pizza with my ASU M&G before until tonight, and it was more successful than I ever could have hoped for.

I call up the Domino’s guy and proceed to say say it’s my first time ordering pizza with M&G. He then gets all chatty. He asks for my name and tells me that he is going to butcher the spelling.

“That’s alright, everyone does,” I say.

He continues to tell me how he has a best friend named Brian who he had stored in his cell phone as “Bran.” Don’t worry, they’re still friends despite the spelling error.

Meanwhile, Michelle is in the back whisperly shouting “What are you doing? Quit flirting with the pizza man.” Then flails her arms and says “WAIT! Keep flirting! DISCOUNTS!”

So Domino’s boy and I wrap up the order and the conversation with a “alright mah du.”

Then Michelle and I do some basic math. We realize we ordered three medium sized pizzas for 10 people. This will not do. Michelle decides to call back and order more.

“Hi, I’d like to speak to Bran. I’m Michelle, Jaclyn’s roommate… We’re going to need three more pizzas.”

Except it was not the same Domino’s guy, but an older gentlemen instead who had no idea what she was talking about.

You’ve got some ‘splaning to do!!!!

 

oops

 

We eat. Frequently. So we tend to find ourselves without means of substance and have to take the occasional trip down to Safeway. Never do this right after class when you haven’t eaten for about 6 hours. The result is horrific.

We don’t fight really fight, we roommates have tiffs. Tiffs that I never thought would end up in the bread aisle over whether to get honey berry wheat bread, cornbread, regular wheat bread, or honey wheat bread. Or over whether or not buying a fudge kit on clearance is a brilliant idea. Or which kind of cheese to agree on.
Oh the joys of living together!
My way to resolve everything is to just let everyone be happy. I get the fudge kit. You can have the frosted animal crackers. We will get all of the breads…etc
Unfortunately, this wasn’t a financially sound idea. We start placing everything on the little belt counter thing and the tiny calculators in our heads start calculating.
We exchange panic stricken glances….
“Did you type in the savings card already?”…”I’m putting the candle back.”…”Does that say 116$?!!!!!”
Jaclyn is instantly livid because I just came from class and only brought 46$ in cash and left my wallet in the room, which means this all has to go on her card. Which means death stares, snide comments about getting too grab-happy in the juice aisle, and a few inaudible mutterings directed towards moi. And to make matters worse, we have so much food that we can’t even carry it ourselves.

Lesson learned. List. Budget. Shop with full bellies.

well stocked

Exhibit Bread